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- FUNNY QUESTIONS ARE BACK -

The rules of this contest are simple

  • Write a funny question as an answer to this post. Put the title of that question following a #.

  • You may use plays on words, you may make fun of noobs, regular users, or smart users.

  • You may pretty much use any method you want to make your question funny.

  • The winner will be decided based on who has the most up votes.

  • Downvotes are Not Counted When determing the winner, so save your daily votes. (you only get 40)

  • Although I highly doubt there are any five-year-olds on this site, we must use the same rule from the previous image contests, and keep the entries "Politically Correct" .

  • This is the second time this event has run. You may NOT copy entries from that event and post them here. Mostly/Entirely original content is recommended.

  • The main point is to create a question that other users will see funny.

  • The winner will be chosen and his/her/its entry will be accepted. The link to that entry will be placed in the space below, along with the entries that almost won.

  • The winner will be chosen on September 27th. Other entries are welcome after that, but the winners entree will stay accepted (even if new entries gain more upvotes).

  • YOUR QUESTION SHOULD NOT BE POSTED ON THE MAIN SITE OR IN ANY PLACE OTHER THAN THIS POST UNLESS YOUR QUESTION IS A REAL, SERIOUS QUESTION.

- You may enter no more than twice.

However, only one entree can obtain first place. (Obviously)

WINNER AS OF 9-27-2015

First Place -Gandalf3 6 votes

Second Place -Gandalf3 5 votes

Third Place -GiantCowFilms 4 votes

This post is not "off-topic," as it has already run once without objection, and the results were fantastic.

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    $\begingroup$ Whats with this two rule??? I wan't more funnies, not less! $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Sep 24, 2015 at 22:57
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    $\begingroup$ I suggest that we wait until the deadline of the contest to allow voting, then have a 2-3 day "voting period". Otherwise, as kind of happened last time, the first entries will have a huge advantage. $\endgroup$
    – PGmath
    Sep 26, 2015 at 2:37
  • $\begingroup$ Good idea, we can try that next time. $\endgroup$
    – X-27 is done with the network
    Sep 26, 2015 at 2:48

10 Answers 10

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I saw this story made in MS paint, how to do it in blender?

One fine day the colorful hills of Stackexchangia were just as calm and peaceful as always.

image of explosions in an otherwise peaceful setting

Tardises were making, Novices were disguising, X was 27, and the M.O.D. team was still busy deciding the meaning of their acronym.

All was right in this corner of interland.. Until there came a disturbance. Something unusual. Something uncanny. Some thing which did not quite have a definition. No one knew what this thing might be.

image of blender falling from sky

Upon consulting their ancient storehouses of knowledge and wisdom handed down through many external sources, they discovered that the thing had a name. Many broken hyperlinks ago in an ip range far away, this long lost and forgotten thing was known as an "overused joke".

Long they debated what to do next. The guy with the funny hat said
"Why, this be thine kitchen implement"!
The XL cow said
"Perhaps beating it with a hammer will help"?

image of giant cow with a hammer

Eventually they set out on a quest to find The Answer, hidden somewhere in the vast wide wonderful world of interland. Adventuring long and far, they encountered many things strange to behold.

To this day they have yet to find The Answer; but continue searching just in case 13,478 isn't enough.

I wasn't sure where to start, so I tried using this on it. Now it looks better:

on fin day th coloro hilz of ztackexchangia wer ot az calm & pec az alwayz

imag of explozionz in an otherwiz pec zeting htp://giantgfycatcom/zinotameblacklegif no cowz wer harmed in th making ofdiz gif

tardiz wer making novicz wer dizozing x waz 27 &de mod tem waz ztil oy deciding th mening ofder acronym

al waz rigt indiz corner of interl& untilder cam a dizobanc zomething uoual zomething uncany zom thing which did not ot hav a definition no 1 knew whatdizding migt be

imag of blender faling from zky htp://giantgfycatcom/zlimharmoniohydatidtapewormgif i bet u didnt oz what it waz

upon conotingder ancient z2rehoz of knowledg & wizdom h&ed down throh many external zoczdey dizcovereddatde ding had a nam many broken hyperlinkz htp://blenderztackexchangecom/oztionz/18665/help-me-plz-i-cant-fioe-thiz-o ago in an ip rang far awaydiz long lozt & 4gotending waz known az an oved joke

longdey deb8d what 2 do next th o with th ony hat zaid
whydiz bdin kitchen implement!
th xl cow zaid
perhapz b8ing it with a hamer wil help?

imag of giant cow with a hamer htp://giantgfycatcom/lefyflawlzbegif & not ot any old hamer atdat

evenolydey zet o on a ozt 2 find th anzwer hiden zomewher in th vazt wid 1dero world of interl& htpz://xkcdcom/256/ advenoing long & fardey encotered many thingz htp://wwwoztercom/zervice-&-oport/prot-oport/prot-faqz/blenderz/general-oztionz/blenderz-general-oztionz-faqhtml ztrang 2 behold

htp://giantgfycatcom/loathzomecoztlyoflehedgif i cant red abo blenderz with a ztraigt fac anymore

2diz daydey hav yet 2 find th anzwer o contio zerching ot in caz 13478 iznt enoh

bu i dontdink it helped enoh can zome1 writ an anzwer plz?
mayb i ned mor comprzion it zayz it only re th ziz by 15% d:

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  • $\begingroup$ My neck! Ahh, my neck! Its all fine and well not hurting cows in the first gif, but the third gif is another story. $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Sep 27, 2015 at 22:30
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    $\begingroup$ Best Entree Ever!!! This should Sooooo win!!!!! $\endgroup$
    – X-27 is done with the network
    Sep 27, 2015 at 23:55
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    $\begingroup$ Gandalf you have out done yourself (and everybody else) this is great! $\endgroup$
    – David
    Sep 28, 2015 at 0:05
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    $\begingroup$ This is awesome! You should stick this on BA. $\endgroup$
    – PGmath
    Sep 28, 2015 at 15:23
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    $\begingroup$ I like how everyone goes off in a boat when they've got a WORKING TARDIS with them. It's much more comfortable. Would you rather be in a small boat, or a huge TARDIS that can travel through time and space at the click of a button. It's a no brainer really. $\endgroup$
    – TARDIS Maker
    Sep 28, 2015 at 15:49
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    $\begingroup$ I guess that means they must have no brains $\endgroup$
    – gandalf3
    Sep 28, 2015 at 17:08
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    $\begingroup$ The whole thing is pure awesome. :-D I especially liked how the diffuse-white Suzannoid doesn't know what to do with the sailboat and keeps trying to put it on the stray Suz head. I just noticed where the giant cow's texture is from... hilarious. Congrats on the win! $\endgroup$
    – Mentalist
    Oct 4, 2015 at 3:13
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    $\begingroup$ Haha, just seeing this. Loved it. $\endgroup$
    – iKlsR
    Dec 27, 2015 at 1:20
  • $\begingroup$ @iKlsR :D hey, welcome back! $\endgroup$
    – gandalf3
    Dec 27, 2015 at 1:57
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enter image description here

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    $\begingroup$ Wait a second, let me get this straight. You don't know how to ask a question, so you made an ANIMATED gif to try to "explain" your issue, and you knew enough about the theme to know what the color of links AND the font are? $\endgroup$
    – TARDIS Maker
    Sep 24, 2015 at 16:47
  • $\begingroup$ @TARDISMaker I just followed the instructions.. $\endgroup$
    – gandalf3
    Sep 24, 2015 at 19:38
  • $\begingroup$ (serious question) What do the <!--/--> tags do? $\endgroup$
    – PGmath
    Sep 26, 2015 at 2:40
  • $\begingroup$ @PGmath Those are comments, used to prevent bits of markdown from rendering. $\endgroup$
    – gandalf3
    Sep 26, 2015 at 5:56
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Poor Newbness

enter image description here

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    $\begingroup$ On your latest post, 1 view and -3 score????? $\endgroup$
    – X-27 is done with the network
    Sep 24, 2015 at 3:12
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    $\begingroup$ @X-27 Even the spam bots and web crawlers were horrified enough to DV $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Sep 24, 2015 at 23:00
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    $\begingroup$ How did that meta post get 6 upvotes? $\endgroup$
    – Gwen
    Oct 30, 2015 at 9:52
  • $\begingroup$ @Gwenn because at least he tried to go to meta to get his issue resolved $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Oct 30, 2015 at 14:49
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How to do simple thing: Select cube?

How can I select a cube in blender? I'm so leet I think minimalist answers are cool! Its called efficiency.

enter image description here

enter image description here

LMB

You use LMB. I totally new that, I'm just trying to get an extra 55 rep from my bros in chatz!. (where else do you think I got all that reps) Yah, yah, I know nobody will actually find this useful, but its within the rules! (not bother to link, only noobs don't know where that meta post is)

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    $\begingroup$ I'm sorry, but you're wrong. You use RMB to select! Unless you're stupid (like me) and decide to change it to LMB which doesn't make any sense cause it's not like everything else uses that. $\endgroup$
    – TARDIS Maker
    Sep 23, 2015 at 22:29
  • $\begingroup$ @TARDISMaker Oh lolz... I'm so pro I use blender left-handed with a single button mouse! So there is only a Left-mouse, button. Duh you newbs... $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Sep 23, 2015 at 23:02
  • $\begingroup$ Did you mean l337? $\endgroup$
    – gandalf3
    Sep 23, 2015 at 23:48
  • $\begingroup$ @gandalf3 Wut dat? $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Sep 23, 2015 at 23:49
  • $\begingroup$ Instead of selecting the cube yourself write a question in Blender.Stackexchange and have someone select it for you! $\endgroup$
    – user1853
    Oct 7, 2015 at 1:23
  • $\begingroup$ What did I just read... $\endgroup$
    – Shady Puck
    Aug 25, 2016 at 21:20
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    $\begingroup$ @ShadyPuck A parody of people who self answer questions to get extra rep, despite creating virtually useless content. $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Aug 25, 2016 at 21:25
  • $\begingroup$ @GiantCowFilms Heh... One of my posts. $\endgroup$
    – Shady Puck
    Aug 25, 2016 at 21:27
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Help Using Blender

Sorry for the noob question...

I have been trying to use my blender for a while now...

I've got some of the functions straight, but it's all so complicated to me...

I cannot seem to figure out how to utilize the bake functionality.

When trying to move things around the slowest I can get is still too fast for me. Can the speed settings be more flexible?

Also, the minute I start it up everything gets all messed up, I can't create fine animation.

Hope someone can help me here, it seems instead of a mesh I just have everything mushed up...

If it helps, my version of the tool:

my Blender
This image is from the user Chris 73 and is freely available at wikimeaia under the creative commons cc-by-sa 3.0 license.

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DUDE I NEED HELP, STOP CLOSING MY QUESTIONS

i CAME HERE FOR SOME HELP AND ALL THET HAPENS IS THESE PEOPLE WITH DIAMONDS DELETE MY POSTS. i AM A VERY SERIOUS bLENDER USER THAT NEEDS REAL HELP. wHY ARE YOU SO WORREED ABOUT QUAILITY ANYWAYS? wHEN SOMEONE NEEDS HELP THEN YOU SHOULD HELP THEM. i THINK MY POSTS ARE VERY CLEAR, i DON'T SEE WAHT YUR PROBLEMS ARE!!!!!!!!!!!

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  • $\begingroup$ If you're going to go for a caps lock style, go all the way. NO LOWER CASE $\endgroup$
    – TARDIS Maker
    Sep 26, 2015 at 15:06
  • $\begingroup$ @TARDISMaker Well when you gotta caps lock then like you try capitiklize a wurd an it dont work, it gets small $\endgroup$
    – J Sargent
    Sep 26, 2015 at 15:12
  • $\begingroup$ Aim for China, not the earths core. $\endgroup$
    – TARDIS Maker
    Sep 26, 2015 at 15:13
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Blender StackExchange needs a better class of criminal...

And I'm going to give it to them!

Just look at this... GiantCowFilms. Broke one rule by writing three questions. He was only allowed two, so added one to it! Then he read this post and deleted one! I'm tellin ya, if you're gonna break the rules, go all the way. Don't attack the earths core, attack china! If you fail, at least you'll be half way between the earths core and china so you can at least choose which one would be more worth while to capture for next time.

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Help with tutorial

I'm trying to follow a tutorial but I'm getting confused. Is there a tutorial I can watch so that I can learn how to follow tutorials?

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    $\begingroup$ You need to watch this tutorial! it will teach you the basics of watching tutorial help tutorials, which will provide you the knowledge to watch you first tutorial! $\endgroup$
    – X-27 is done with the network
    Dec 2, 2015 at 14:57
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HELP i have some problem!

Meta Note: These are all quotes of this guy generated by this spam bot, enjoy.

The active object is a lattice. It does the exact same thing as shining a laser towards each of the key combinations to invert the child of constraint. Is that you should not have any modifiers or simpler way to make a shape would be to look at your entire model.

In this gif I think it works quite well in Camera view NumPad 0. Then check the Keep Original Resolution check box in the Batch Converter settings in the image below on each of the tool shelf. I prefer the image below both the cube and color mix has the advantage of the key combinations to invert the Normalize node. Add a Normal Map node. Another option is to use any means of changing the frame. You can use any means that Blender can be used commercially by artists, by studios to make animation films or vfx, by game.

The list of objects that are near, and sets the message actuator's "To:" field to one of the objects. That is the frame number in the manual after specifying the target as the active object (the curve). It sets a Object parent, with a Combine XYZ node. The parent bone will not effect the four methods explained above. For a Separate RGB node. Then the magic happens: That function starts the ray at the radar object can see it, if some of the other color operations will. You need to create a mask is in the bottom socket, or Groups The license must not discriminate against any person or group of that large list, there really only available when the active object is animated. Your second problem was the "visible" objects, I'm checking that a Lattice modifier to the board object. You needed the Action actuator on.

If statements works like this: anything you will ever really need for blender. Your three main choices are near, and sets the message actuator's field to one of the Mouse Actuator, set to Look that disables Global Undo). However there are a two shaders the opaque (Diffuse node), and then the transparent (Glass node), then a way to mix has the advantage of not returning a darker result than either image, like some of the other color ramp is the mask. Plug that the properties window runs bpy.context.object.parent = None for poly in plane.data.polygons: center is where I'm rotation the view, and where Lock Camera To View X axis (or accessible via the Bezier Circle (added in step 3). Also set the Object of the radar sensor, so the two will display the changed image in the cause of your problem. There is no confusion with the active object.

Thanks in advance.

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    $\begingroup$ I perfectly under stood that. The solution is quite simple. However, I cannot write it from my iPhone and will be moving to central Africa tomorrow where there is no internet. Sorry, but I do know the answer. $\endgroup$
    – GiantCowFilms
    Sep 28, 2015 at 0:17
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Import - Export - Report MAJOR ISSUE

I need to import my .banana, .strawberry and .ice file into my blender. I'm doing this for a school report. After that I need to export my .docx report. Thansk a mill. BTW, NO PYTHON, I got an F in computer science :O. Cyu later.

posted on behalf of GiantCowFilms
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